Match Reports

Supers v Rossmoyne/Vic Park Pigs

The lines were painted, the goal post pads were in place, oranges cut* and even the sun was coming out as the anticipation built amongst the fans for the start of the supers game. The only thing missing was the supers themselves.

Fortunately, Higgsy had once again called upon some members of his band of merry men, Pigs were generous enough to lend us their two best players and BP was both very quick and clearly very persuasive in convincing close to half the masters side to have another game. And so with this eclectic combination of players, the stage was set for the final match of the season to get underway.

It didn’t take long for Wembley to gain the upper hand with Higgsy racking up plenty of early possessions. But despite the ball spending most of its time in the Wembley forward half, a lack of clean ball handling made scoring hard to come by. Undeterred, Wembley kept pressing and eventually the challenge of clean ball handling played to their advantage as the Pigs fullback dropped the ball cold in the goal square while simultaneously slipping over and gifting BOM the opening goal of the game.

The hard slog continued in the second quarter as Mark Bosnich seemingly made a guest appearance for Pigs, making several desperate goal line saves. While some of them would never pass the scrutiny of VAR, including Ryno’s certain goal, the decisions stood and Wembley still had plenty of work to do. Meanwhile the Wembley defence were growing uneasy by the number of Pigs they had for company, seemingly all taking a rest in their forward line.

After having all the momentum in the first half, Wembley had only a modest lead going into the main break. That lead became even more precarious in the third quarter as the backline’s fears turned prophetic. Outnumbered, even the combined stellar efforts of Pipes, DOL, Chidz and Burgo were unable to hold out the Pigs any longer and two quick goals had Wembley’s lead looking dicey.

But Wembley weren’t going to be denied victory, not today. Daz started attaching himself to the Pigs ball carriers like a limpet latching onto a ship hull. But unlike a limpet, he was very effective in not
letting them go anywhere. Plonk repeatedly demonstrated the clean hands that continued to elude so many others, dishing out sweeping Polly Farmer handballs at will. Pistol and Uni were the perfect links to get the ball deep inside 50 and when BP finished on a tough angle late in the term the game was well and truely back on Wembley’s terms.

There was no looking back for Wembley in the final quarter. After toiling hard all day in the ruck, Duncan was running out the game strongly and running through would be tacklers like a bull on the loose on the streets of Pamplona. The scoring started to flow more freely as Bassie and Brock joined the goal kicking party, while at the other end of the ground Burgo was celebrating with his own little dance number on the goal line.

A well earned win for Wembley, made possible by our group of honorary team members for the day.

*No oranges were harmed in the making of this match report.

– Craig “Supercoach” Earl-Spurr

Masters v Vic Park Pigs

We headed on the long trip down to Ferndale with high expectations. The sight of Dan in a jumper gave the boys great motivation, as he was prepared to play his first game in 2 years. The motivation quickly disappeared. The cold breeze picked up as rain began to sprinkle, but the excitement of the first bounce momentarily provided warmth.

I was always taught that the first bounce was a scene setter. All the eyes of every player and the crowd were focused on that first contest and the ruckman. Our eyes set on our ruckman, Irish, to set the scene and he did. He ran straight into the stationary opposition ruckman and went to ground remonstrating with the umpire as to why he didn’t receive a free kick. After a couple of skill errors and slick ball movement from the opposition, they kicked the first goal quickly.

The ball went back to the centre and Irish thought he would try the same manoeuvre. Surely, he would draw a freekick this time? No. The ball was waltzed out with him laying on his back complaining. After the third contest where Irish was kneed straight down the middle, I thought he would be done but Irish kept going at it all day and gave his all.

The Pigs were well and truly in command throughout the first quarter with only our stellar backline keeping us competitive. Pipes, Daz, Chidz and DC were all holding us up and battling hard.

We entered the second quarter with a few intricate changes to the team. Cogs, Bassie and Plonk raffled who would take each ruck contest and Joda got to the game and was successfully trust into the midfield. BOM added some much-needed pace to what looked a very slow forward line and we seemed to at least break even on the scoreboard.

The rest of the game seemed much the same. Some good passages of play mixed in with a lot of chasing tail. Dan hit the scoreboard in his return after milking a 50-metre penalty from the Pig’s ruckman who seemed to have little knowledge of the rules. The ruckman was subsequently told to have rest after calling the umpire a blatant cheat.

Overall, while it was a disappointing loss, we battled hard after a slow start. Mike, Joda, Bassie and Plonk held up the midfield and the whole backline were gallant. Thanks to those who doubled up from the Seniors. Unfortunately, Cogs went down with what looked a bad knee injury and we hope for the best.

Thanks to Dan (AKA Coach Andy as he’s known by the ladies) for his time and guidance throughout the year. Hopefully, the Masters side can continue to build and we spend the Summer wisely by recruiting anyone we meet over 35.

– Scott “Deputy Dog” McManus

Seniors v Vic Park Pigs

Bruce – Welcome ladies and Gentlemen, here we are, nice and early on a brisk Sunday morning, and I for one, found this morning’s contest a highly entertaining affair, what were your views Frank?

Frank – You bastard, you said we were playing golf

Bruce – Did you know Frank, the name Ferndale originated from developers who decided not to proceed with the City of Canning’s choice of Shearnstead.

Frank – did u say shitshow – they shoulda stuck with that

Bruce – In 1965, the name change was approved – the Ferndale Fairies cricket team actually played here…

Frank – Now that I believe

Bruce – Well lets go through the game and have a close look at some of the players, I think the Wembley boys dominated in most facets of the game today..

Frank – Worst game of anything I have ever seen

Bruce – I think some of the errors may have been to the fierce nature of the contest

Frank – Or – because they’re all a bunch of old tossers or should be home whinging about young people

Bruce – let’s have a close look at the backline, now Selfie proved a reliable member of the last line of defence – he was solid all day

Frank – bout as solid as his stool I’d wager – but at least he has a solid stach

Bruce – Brynna, the coach, now he’s a footballers footballer, in every contest, nothing got past him today, gets himself to every contest – took some solid marks today, had stints on the Ruck, was strong and aggressive, he did it all

Frank – sorry did you say he did f*ck all?

Bruce – Now what about Beeps, BP – he plays three games every week, puts himself in harm’s way, he also had a stint in the middle, he’s the heart and soul of the club, he had a ton of the ball today, constantly hit targets – name the last time you saw him play a bad game

Frank – today

Bruce – Let’s take a look a Lui’s game – this bloke gets a lot of the ball, he has solid hands and knows what to do with it, a fan favourite, and rightly so.

Frank – the bloke with all the clothes on? – is he a burns victim? – that explains a lot

Bruce – I think the spine down back at Wembley is sight to behold when you have Simmo down there – how many intercept marks did he take today – and it’s not like he ever just takes a grab and wanders back on his mark – he grabs the ball, burns about 57 blokes and drives the ball half way down the ground – BOG for me today..an absolute blinder

Frank – The pretty guy with the nice hair?

Bruce – Rounding out the backline was Wal, lovely kick of the football, did his hammy I believe, a great shame on the last game – he was looking good down there and primed for a big game

Frank – Thank god, one less I had to watch

Bruce – Wattsie, now he’s a lovely kick of football, he took a number of solid marks today, owned his wing today, both offensively and defensively did it all today – there is talk about naming one of the wings out at Wembley after this bloke..

Frank – now that’s just a blatant lie

Bruce – Bomma – A good Richmond man – he’s a tank that guy, in absolutely everything, marks, runs, goals, hard balls – never still, always running, for smaller guy he took some nice contested marks again today – how many Metres gained did he rack up today?

Frank – 6

Bruce – Poobah – started off on the other wing, he’s had a great year after his injury riddled campaign last year, he’s the Rolls Royce of Wembley when he lines up for a kick looks like an instructional video – just wonderful to watch, sublime skills

Frank – Preferred him last year when he was in a sling

Bruce – Slarkey – old sticky fingers, named on a flank played like Derm at CHF – if Simmo was the marking wall down back – this bloke was so far ahead of the game up forward – he made the other blokes look silly

Frank – The other blokes are silly

Bruce – Every footy fan loves the in and under players – people come for miles to watch the tough blokes just rip in and get the ball – and for this side – that’s Draggers – you could say he dragged this team today – just as solid around the contest as you could get – they put him on the ball in the end he was that good today – had an absolute ton of it

Frank – There were no fans here, I saw a three legged dog on the sidelines, three ambulances and a shitload of beer

Bruce – when we talk about skilled players and Wembley we’re talking about Prindi – talk about a nice kick –here’s another player who got a lot of it and used it well, I cannot recall a time in today’s; game where he missed a target

Frank – The seafood bloke, I dun wanna say anything bad about him – I like crayfish

Bruce – Speaking about hard nuts, how solid was Mikey R – what a nugget, took on blokes twice his size today, more than once and knocked em over – another player who go swung onto the ball because of his hard balls

Frank – the ball spends most of its time on the ground – so yeah – the little blokes get near it

Bruce – Plugger – Spaceman – how many grabs today – another member of the famed Wembley spine, best season he’s played this year I reckon really made the key positions up forward his own this year

Frank – Is he the bloke who wrote the rules on engagement on the APP? – shit does that mean I cant bag him

Bruce – Rounding out the forward pack on this last day of battle was SuperMario brothers – I reckon he looked like there was two of him today – he got to that many contests – he also has a really solid pair of hands and a solid kick – good to see him finish the year so well

Frank – it’s the last game!! – thank god

Bruce – the big Irishman, gee whiz he’s in everything, covered a lot of ground for a big man today, put the ball down his mid’s throat consistently today, a lot of contested ball, everyone loves him, just had a heap of it – keeps the chatter up – another solid game from a solid footballer

Frank – the bloke actually kicked to himself – landed on his head – it was the absolute highlight of the day – actually the best part of him is his sledging – of his own teammates

Bruce – How many goals did Sarge kick today – says a lot about a small bloke when he’s the leading goal kicker, hard at it and skilled, was there abouts all day – and used it to good affect – saved his best game for last

Frank – was he the bloke who threw it last week?

Bruce – and that leaves Eppo, got a few hard balls today, and bobbed up in the end and kicked a handy goal

Frank – he kicked a goal!! – what were they 25 metres wide and was he 3 metres out? – he turns it over so many times the other mob had him down for metres gained…

Bruce – well that’s another year – can’t wait to get back next year and call some more footy with you Frank…what are you most looking forward to over summer

[Editor:

Frank – cancer

Bruce – lastly, can’t forget, Mikey E, captain-coach extraordinaire, didn’t play today due injury but a pivotal member of the team all year with his inspiring leadership.

Frank: is that the guy who just holds the magnets aloft each quarter break, mumbles something about Prindi and BOM swapping in the center then forlornly hopes Sarge or Newboy will fill the silence shouting something footbally? Didn’t play you say? Best contribution he could have made.]

– Mike “I’m a Supercoach too” Ehlers