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Wembley Supers v Northern Warriors
What’s in a Name?
Nickname: A descriptive name given in place of, or in addition to, the official name of a person, place or thing.
Nicknames. They’re an important part of the Australian culture. Footy club culture is but a microcosm of the greater Australian culture and therefore nicknames play an important role in the culture of footy clubs. At least, that’s our excuse and we’re sticking with it.
The thing about nicknames is that they are generally foistered upon you. Sometimes as a result of your surname, a play on a part of your name, a childhood habit, a unique characteristic or an unfortunate drunken incident. You don’t really get to choose them and even if you do, it’s not long before your mates have given you a different one.
At Wembley, we’ve got some pearlers. Porno, Poohbah, Deluxe, Flicka, Flanders, Aravinda, and Dogga to name but a few. Sure, we’ve got your garden variety add a ‘y’ to the end of your surname types, but more often than not the boys at the club work hard to make people feel welcome by giving them a nickname they’d rather not have...
If you are one of the few at the club that don’t have a nickname, don’t stress, we’ll find you one. And even if you do have one that you really like, we’ll soon give you a better one. Just ask Glen ‘Jane’ Austen. There are some blokes, like Bevan Sturgess-Smith for example, that seem to have alluded the rite of passage that goes with having a nickname bestowed upon them. It’s not that we don’t like you Squeaky, we just haven’t come up with a really good one yet.
Sometimes events occur that provide an opportunity for someone to acquire a new nickname. Such an event occurred on Saturday night in the Supers game against the Warriors.
There are 17 nervous blokes now reading this report.
But let’s delay the agony by talking about the game.
Ah, there’s a lot to love about Round 1. You haven’t been injured yet, the coach thinks you can play, your team mates think you can play, hell, you think you can play! Of course in most cases this all comes crashing to a thud at the hands of reality at about the 7 minute mark of the first quarter. For blokes like Aravinda, reality sets in at about the 4 minute mark.
Of the warm-up.
It was during the warm-up that we found out we were a little light on for numbers. Thankfully, Steve ‘Brainy’ Brain and Sean ‘Sarge’ Sargent stayed back after their Masters game and offered their services. Brainy would not only fill in, he’d end up being one of the best players on the ground. This is a superb effort for anyone, let alone a man with no leg muscles. As for Sarge, well his opponent was best on ground, but beggars can’t be choosers...
Another individual who really stepped up was Bevan. His umpiring was exemplary and set the tone for a match played in great spirits by two teams who were having a dip. Great job Squeaky.
But Bevan isn’t the subject of the event leading to a new nickname. As much as we all hope that Squeaky sticks.
The wind was blowing a gale on Saturday night which meant that the game was pretty well played down one end for the duration. We kicked with it in the first quarter and made the most of the howling breeze. In fact, the Warriors didn’t get it forward of centre more than twice for the quarter, and on those two occasions the Wembley defence led by Ian ‘Boothy’ Booth repelled them with vigour and purpose. We would have made even more of it had Leigh ‘Junkie’ Junk not dropped more marks than the German stock exchange.
The second quarter would see the game played mostly in the Warriors front half, but Ian ‘Boothy’ Booth and Steve ‘Brainy’ Brain were defending like men possessed and ensured that there wasn’t too much damage done on the scoreboard. New recruits, Glen ‘Jane’ Austen, Brad ‘Insert Nickname Here’ Bennett and Mark ‘Devo’ Devine were racking up quality touches and helping Boothy and Brainy keep the ball from going through the Warriors goal.
It was in the second quarter that it happened. Now, it has to be said that Ian ‘Boothy’ Booth is much loved down at the club. He’s a quiet guy with a raking left foot, a strong overhead grab, an impressive vertical leap and a hair cut that is the envy of accountants everywhere. As his brother in law, I can honestly say that the only time I have ever seen him anywhere nearing something akin to ‘aggressive’ is in his trading strategy for Dream Team.
However, when someone tackles you to the floor and flips you over after you’ve gone out of bounds, you have every right to be somewhat annoyed in my opinion. Having been flipped, Boothy showed Ninja like skills to roll on top of his opponent and, wait for it, pull the trigger.
And so, Ian ‘Trigger’ Booth is born. It’s got a nice ring to it doesn’t it? And it’s dripping in irony. Perfect.
The second half pretty much mirrored the first, but Trigger kept it in the holster and Junkie held his marks. He just couldn’t kick straight. Thank goodness that the new guys in Brad Bennett and Jane Austen knew where the big poles were.
The final quarter saw some excellent gut running from Ben ‘Spits’ Spitteler and Aaron ‘Deluxe’ Brinkworth. Neither of them touched the footy, but their gut running would have impressed Ben Cousins.
At the end of the game Craig ‘KB’ Nelmes brought us in together and made some honourable mentions. The most stark was this, and I quote, ‘That is the best game I’ve ever seen from Aravinda’. This would normally be high praise, but it just meant that Ara actually touched the ball this week.
Well played fellas, looking forward to next week’s game against Brentwood-Booragoon.
Pick of the Bunch: Boothie, Brainy, Aravinda, Brad Bennett, Jane Austen
Turkey of the Week: This is a new award made possible thanks to our friends at Alaturka Restaurant. Each week a $50 dinner voucher is on offer for the Turkey of the Week. This week there could only be one winner.
Congratulations Trigger, hope you and Nicki enjoy the meal.
Wembley Masters V Mandurah
27 March 2010
Season 2010 is back and don’t we love it!!!!!!
Lightning Park was the venue for the first game of 2010 for the old blokes from the Masters Wembley Vets. The weather could have been kinder to us with humid and overcast conditions with an absolute howling gale to the North East. It was arguable how many goals the wind advantage was to the side kicking with the wind, conservatively it had to be at least a 5 to 6 goal advantage. However credit to the Wembley (and Mandurah) sides as both teams gave it a real go against the breeze.
To set the scene, in the forward line we had one of the heaviest in recent years with a distinct slope downwards towards our goals. There was yours truly, Vinnie and Crispy making up the full forward line with Big Andy and new recruit Rod across the half forward line, who had an outstanding debut. There is no doubt the weight of the forward line added another two goal advantage to us when Mandurah were kicking into the breeze.
The game itself was a combination of the Familiar and the New. The Familiar being Sarge, Creedy and Newboy dominating across the centre line and Snowy picking up more than his fair share of possessions. Magic earned himself the new “Player of the Day” award kindly sponsored by Alaturka Restaurant in Subiaco, given by the captain of the day Rod, with an outstanding display at centre halfback setting up many attacking moves. Bevo played his usual roving commission role, as he did last year, playing in whatever position he felt like and picking more than his fair share of possessions. Coach Selfy had an outstanding game at full back deep in defence saving several goals, or was it he decided to stay put while his fellow back man wondered up the ground trying to get a kick when we were kicking into the howling gale?
The New, being the new recruits to the Masters side in 2010. Well done to Jason, Rod on the half forward line, Meady who had more than his fair share of possessions coming out of the backline, Tony who, due to his late arrival, got the coveted bench position before coming on to be the lightest member on the forward line. Paddo made a remarkable on field display running from his car while pulling on his boots and coming straight onto the half forward line midway through the first term. Thanks Paddo I did appreciate the apology for the 3 attempted passes that went to the right, left and over my head! Also Bevan, being the gentleman he is, also apologised for much of the same. Thank you.
Whilst on the subject of myself, which readers of this column will appreciate I spend quite a bit of time talking about.....why?......because I can. I had one of my quieter days with one very strong mark overhead which tested the preseason injury received in Dublin of a broken hand, to the full extent. I'm happy to say so far, although it is only early days, the injury toll on my hand (and the rest of my body from last year) is holding up well. Although the hand could be a possible contributing factor (after that great mark) to the “shanked” kick from 20 metres out! There is no doubt I could have had an absolute day out if the elements and wind were not working against me. There was a least five or six clear leads which could have been easily converted into goals. Well that’s my story anyway.
Before I stop talking about my game, I will argue that I was part of the play of the day with a hand ball assist that ended up with a great linkage of play with Crispy converting. The linkage and handball were certainly a highlight of the teams play all day.
On the subject of Crispy, after a promising start with a couple of early goals, he made a good attempt at marking the ball with his face, before ignoring the blood rule and playing on!!!!!! On a more serious note, his brave return to the field in the last quarter after what appears to be a serious knee injury in the third quarter, which sounded like a pop from a bag of popcorn, is also worth a mention. Apologies to Sarge as I was not calling for him to have a look at Crispy, but rather a call for the stretcher as I thought there was no way he was getting up. Let's hope the knee injury is not too serious.
Another highlights of the day included some new bloke called John “black shorts” who appeared from nowhere in the second half and took some of the best defensive grabs that have been seen in recent years in the Masters team. Welcome to the club and there's no doubt you will hold down a good position on the backline!
All in all not a bad day out for the Masters in very average windy conditions. Credit to Mandurah for the sportsman like attitude they displayed during the game and congratulations to our president Tony in initiating the handshake and pat on the back in the centre of the Oval after the game with the opposition.
I am looking forward to an enjoyable 2010 season. With the exception of the bye next round, I can't wait for the season to unfold and I am certainly hoping to talk obsessively about more than the “three possessions” I had in this game, with a better game in four weeks time.
Thanks finally, must go to Brainy, for remembering the jumpers this week after last year's effort in the last game and to Smithy for his usual outstanding umpiring display and awarding of more 50m penalties than we saw all last year.
Welcome back everyone (and Bev’s parents)
Big Joey Agnello